Warriors sought after glory, to be honored of men for their good works in keeping the people/village/town/city/culture free. Good men and women have received glory and honor for making positive changes in society. Glorious changes like Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin, George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, Joseph Smith Jr., Mohandas Karamachand Gandhi, Elenore Roosevelt, Susan B. Anthony, and tons more.
Looking back over our history as human beings, there are tons of people who wanted to see something become better, and they actually did something about it. So how do we as every day Joe's and Jane's make changes that are positive, and will affect tons of people down the road? We do something to change our life. That's right. If I want to do something awesome, but want to do it because I feel that it is right. But how does a no-one like me do something big? I start by changing myself. I start getting smarter and learning street smarts, politic smarts, education smarts, learning what's good for the environment, how to keep my kids healthy/active/smart/safe. I learn about spiritual things too.
Life is like a huge scale. You have to balance work, family life, trials, happy times, health, sickness, worldliness and spirituality. Okay, so there are tons of different religions, faiths, beliefs out there, what do you do? Where do you go? What should you look at? Its up to you! What religion, faith, belief will support you in your toughest time? What will teach you truth and light and dis spell the darkness and lack of spiritual peace? I known what I believe to be true. And I am happy with the religion I am enveloped in. I am happy, I am growing, I am learning, I am feeding my Spirit and my mind by attending the church that I do, and by following the Commandments that I follow. I get to use my agency, my free agency to choose to do good or choose to do evil. I know the difference between the two, and know that when I try to do good I am more happy then if I do any of the following five things: 1. choose to do evil, 2. don't do anything, 3. let my natural or carnal self over take my spiritual guidance, 4. have someone else force me to choose how I live my life, 5. have someone else tell me what I can or can't do, taking away my agency.
By living my life, and trying everyday to do better than I did before, and to keep repenting of my mistakes, transgressions, and sins, by forgiving others and forgiving myself and asking to be forgiven, and by allowing God to help me, I come to realize that I don't need to chase fame and honor of the world. I am more happy to please my God, and live a good happy life. And in-so-doing I'm glorifying my Lord!
9/17/10
8/16/10
A Different Kind of Normal
When I chase fame I am desperately striving to be different than those around me. But being different has negative connotations put on by society. Different, strange, odd, weird, nerdy, geeky, funny, class clown, goody two shoes, smarty pants, straight, gay, black, white, colored, religious, atheist, blind, handicapped, retarded, dumb, talented, skilled, successful, etc.
I grew up being different. I came from a large family with only brothers as siblings. My parents never divorced. I was home schooled because of elementary school violence. I hated being a girl growing up with all brothers. I lived on a farm and loved animals more than being with people. I was super shy and had a hard time making friends. I stood out because of my larger boy's clothing I would wear to be modest. I didn't hang out, date or go to any school events, dances that didn't require the Marching/Pep/Concert band. I was always more worried about school and good grades and bringing in good money to pay for college, than living a normal teenage life.
I was ridiculed, mocked, made fun of, teased, and persecuted not only by my peers but by myself as well. Why? Because I felt like I was soooooooooooooooooooooooooo different than others I was around.
Now as a mother, I am finding that talents and abilities that used to set me apart are majorly the same as what other women and especially mother's that I come in contact with have as well. After trying to live a life where I could be different because of some talent or ability or skill that I have gained, I find that my talent's aren't unusual, or special...or so I feel. In fact to put it clearly I have felt that I have nothing to offer others because they have what I have. This type of thinking leads me to feeling incompetent, lacking in self confidence, normal instead of different.
Something I have taken my whole life to over come I am now trying to get back as I chase after fame. I find myself wanting to be different again, because I have no clue how to act, and what to do being normal and have commonalities with others I hang out with.
I grew up being different. I came from a large family with only brothers as siblings. My parents never divorced. I was home schooled because of elementary school violence. I hated being a girl growing up with all brothers. I lived on a farm and loved animals more than being with people. I was super shy and had a hard time making friends. I stood out because of my larger boy's clothing I would wear to be modest. I didn't hang out, date or go to any school events, dances that didn't require the Marching/Pep/Concert band. I was always more worried about school and good grades and bringing in good money to pay for college, than living a normal teenage life.
I was ridiculed, mocked, made fun of, teased, and persecuted not only by my peers but by myself as well. Why? Because I felt like I was soooooooooooooooooooooooooo different than others I was around.
Now as a mother, I am finding that talents and abilities that used to set me apart are majorly the same as what other women and especially mother's that I come in contact with have as well. After trying to live a life where I could be different because of some talent or ability or skill that I have gained, I find that my talent's aren't unusual, or special...or so I feel. In fact to put it clearly I have felt that I have nothing to offer others because they have what I have. This type of thinking leads me to feeling incompetent, lacking in self confidence, normal instead of different. 8/13/10
Fame or Glory
When you become famous you get lots of attention, you are stalked and followed by everyone and their dog so they can get a photo with you or of you, so they can get your autograph and then sell it to make money of their own. You have to have body guards for public events. Your children are branded by your fame, and lead lives of public scorn, jest, and notice.
Do I really want that for my family? Heck NO! Even though I chase fame, I really just want Glory. The glory of God. I enjoy leading a life of a nobody. I enjoy introducing myself to people and no one really know who I am. I enjoy leading a quiet life of love, happiness, and peace.
My little moments of fame are all I can handle. You know may know me as the mom who can't control her children in a store. As the mom who gets frustrated when her children choose to disobey her. As the mom who looks pregnant even when she's not. As the wife who is just now learning how to cook healthy meals for her family. As the wife who hates to clean her house, but does so anyways. As the woman who doesn't know how to use a curling iron, a flat iron, or a blow dryer. As the woman who is just now learning how to apply makeup in a natural way. As the woman who doesn't have confidence in herself, and so has never branched out to do the things she dreams of doing.
Does fame give you confidence? I am willing to bet no. If you don't believe in yourself, and if you don't feel like you have anything to offer then why would being famous help you out? Being famous doesn't guarantee that you have something to offer the world or people in general. But if you do feel like you have something to offer, shouldn't you start by having the desire to be the best you can be with those whom you love, and who love you? Even though I'm not the perfect role model for a mother, wife, and woman I do have people who love me. Even though I still don't think any of my talents and abilities God has given me are better than someone else's or really of importance, I do have talents, abilities, and skills that I secretly work on so I don't lose them.
I mean there's tons of people who can write better than me, and have better grammar. There are tons of people who are better artists, painters, muralists, and crafty people than me. There are tons of people who can afford to be self employed or be working mothers than me. There are tons of people who have learned to use their talents to better their part of the world. And that's because they have confidence in themselves.
So let me ask you, if you could do something because money wasn't an issue, because time wasn't an issue, because square footage wasn't an issue, because nothing was an issue...would you go for it? Would you stop letting that mangy cat dash your dream bubbles to pieces, and go after your "dream"? Do you want fame or glory?
Do I really want that for my family? Heck NO! Even though I chase fame, I really just want Glory. The glory of God. I enjoy leading a life of a nobody. I enjoy introducing myself to people and no one really know who I am. I enjoy leading a quiet life of love, happiness, and peace.
Does fame give you confidence? I am willing to bet no. If you don't believe in yourself, and if you don't feel like you have anything to offer then why would being famous help you out? Being famous doesn't guarantee that you have something to offer the world or people in general. But if you do feel like you have something to offer, shouldn't you start by having the desire to be the best you can be with those whom you love, and who love you? Even though I'm not the perfect role model for a mother, wife, and woman I do have people who love me. Even though I still don't think any of my talents and abilities God has given me are better than someone else's or really of importance, I do have talents, abilities, and skills that I secretly work on so I don't lose them.
I mean there's tons of people who can write better than me, and have better grammar. There are tons of people who are better artists, painters, muralists, and crafty people than me. There are tons of people who can afford to be self employed or be working mothers than me. There are tons of people who have learned to use their talents to better their part of the world. And that's because they have confidence in themselves.
So let me ask you, if you could do something because money wasn't an issue, because time wasn't an issue, because square footage wasn't an issue, because nothing was an issue...would you go for it? Would you stop letting that mangy cat dash your dream bubbles to pieces, and go after your "dream"? Do you want fame or glory?
8/5/10
Pretence Lying
I have been a member of the yahoo group freecycle.org for the past 5 years. I have always had no less than 2 different email addresses and aliases assigned to freecycle in my area. Now this is pretty tricky because when I needed to get rid of items, I had to give the same address or phone number.
After a while people start to realize that something foul is going on, and start ignoring my emails wanting to pick up items. That gets very frustrating. But half as frustrating as my next story.
I'm a mother of younger kids, and right now, we're pretty tight on money trying to pay off some major debt. So I really like finding good deals. Well I had a good amount of baby and toddler items I didn't feel like keeping, so I tried to sell them on the local classifieds and craigslist.com. I didn't get a single bite. That was really sad, because I really needed good money for these really well kept items. So I took them to the store Kid to Kid, and hoped to get no less than $35 for everything.
(I had a car seat only used for 8months, baby toys used only for 6 months, and lots of baby clothes) I figured that was a fair deal, they'd be able to sell everything for more than I hoped to get from everything. Well on the Kid to Kid sell form, they ask you if you want to donate unwanted items or pick them back up. Well I said donate, figuring there wouldn't be much they wouldn't want.
After waiting all weekend I went in on Monday to pick up my money. They were only going to give me $13 cash or $15.89 store credit. They only wanted the car seat. So I lost out big time on everything else I donated. Now the thing that made me realize I was paying for my many many months of lying, is that they claimed everything else I had brought in had stains on them. Which without pictures I know beyond a shadow of a doubt they were NOT stained. I figured they wouldn't want stained items. So I was cheated out of $$ because I had cheated others out of their free items all because I was pretence lying.
Moral of the story, I'm now off freecycle.org, and if I ever get on again, I will be myself, and not lie. I am going to be honest in my dealings with my fellow men, women and children. Because bad charma really does exist. So I'm leaving the bad and bringing the good into my life!
Pretending Too Much
Chasing fame is a lot like plotting out a life time of dreams, wishes, and ideas that would land you in the spot light, and well hopefully alotta dough $$! Dreams can be categorized in groups of realistic dreams, slumber dreams, and fantastical dreams.
Realistic dreams: goals you want to accomplish that may take time, life titles or labels you desire to have associated with you.
Slumber dreams: dreams you have while sleeping that helps you come to a better understanding of yourself, and what you really want out of the journey called life.
Fantastical Dreams: dreams or wishes you have from watching movies, reading books, or going to a Magical theme park.
So what happens when you push away your realistic because they either seem too hard, or its the wrong timing in your life? You start to bring your slumber dreams and fantastical dreams to life. This involves a lot of pretending. But what is pretending...sometimes it could be considered lying. For instance, when you want to take advantage of something free, so you come up with many different names, addresses, and life styles for each of your new aliases. Or when you pretend to be someone you are not, and start to get in trouble so you continue to pretend, and pretend, and lie and lie...blah blah blah...until
BAM WHAM KURPLUNK! Liar Liar your pants really DO catch on FIRE!
Let me give you some examples from my life that just recently happened that opened my eyes to pretence lying.
Realistic dreams: goals you want to accomplish that may take time, life titles or labels you desire to have associated with you.
Slumber dreams: dreams you have while sleeping that helps you come to a better understanding of yourself, and what you really want out of the journey called life.
Fantastical Dreams: dreams or wishes you have from watching movies, reading books, or going to a Magical theme park.
So what happens when you push away your realistic because they either seem too hard, or its the wrong timing in your life? You start to bring your slumber dreams and fantastical dreams to life. This involves a lot of pretending. But what is pretending...sometimes it could be considered lying. For instance, when you want to take advantage of something free, so you come up with many different names, addresses, and life styles for each of your new aliases. Or when you pretend to be someone you are not, and start to get in trouble so you continue to pretend, and pretend, and lie and lie...blah blah blah...until
BAM WHAM KURPLUNK! Liar Liar your pants really DO catch on FIRE!
Let me give you some examples from my life that just recently happened that opened my eyes to pretence lying.
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